I know I do many things badly because im just winging it off without enough contemplation.

That’s me. Very true, only 1 of both parties has to be mindful and that can steer the tone of the conversation.

Not sure, i tried to find the reddit counter parts. Social Skill, communication, social engineering. But nothing popped up

but a linguistic representation of your thoughts. When I envision a thought forming, it’s more like a glowing ball of thought and words can be put together to form a kind of shell around the thought.

Exactly! What a play of words. I often find that core of my idea is decent. But the shell is often lacking, too far away from the core. As you also mentioned, taking your time is a forgotten skill. When we are in an engaging, or charged, argument we tend to want to speak even faster than normal. Slow down, let others wait. Better to say a well thought-out idea, than an incoherent ramble.

That’s really kind of you. Alas my communications problems are really more face to face IRL. You are really kind for offering that tho, all the grace to you <3

two of you vs a problem/issue and you both are working together to find the answer.

I love this. Sadly it often feels like the default is to fall into the you vs them. I really need to meditate more to be clearheaded and keep things like this at the forefront of my mind.

Tact is it’s own thing, and it seems like it’s basically about not threatening other people

I think that is half the battle. And opinions are quick to offend people lol. If u offend them then they are less likely to listen to you. Sometimes I feel like both me and the other party are right, but just by ruffling their feather u have closed their mind. So good communication is inoffensive.

I read quite a bit. Blogs and books. It’s more the speaking part. And conversations often tend to go to politics which doesn’t really interest me. So I find it hard to have good opinions on those kind of matters. And what do you know: those tend to be the charged and opinionated conversations that slowly turn into serious debates lol.

This is one of my pain points. Conveying it in a way that other party can understand clearly.

We understand what we are saying, but the other party doesn’t have your brains. Might be a good idea to place myself as much as I can into the other person. Almost seeing myself in 3rd person through the other.

It’s a solid action rpg. If you are into cyberpunk its worth to buy on a steam sale

Controlling emotions certainly does help with clear thinking, which leads to better communication. But you know how it goes, debates and opinions are charged. Each secretly wants the other to concede and agree.

But I stand by my jadedness otherwise

Cheers to that and my ignorance. May it become less, and better formulated in the future

Avoid long sentences. I agree. I think in trying to elaborate views u can make it more complicated, and get lost in your own words.

More reading…fair enough. Politics, and statistics don’t really tickle my brain. Which leads me to saying ignorant statements…

Great short, and “framework” to keep in mind. This also reminds of the Charisma Triangle. Presence, warmth and power. I guess it’s the same thing. Presence/ethos, warmth/pathos, power might lean towards ethos also.

Have u ever played any rpg that has dialogue options. Deus Ex Machina, Fallout. Often it feels like it would be best to almost have discussions like in a videogame. U pause, see which one will lead to a good charisma check, and pick that one. Yet true conversation flows more natural. Even more so with alcohol, which makes it hard to always be composed enough to pick the right answer.

Fair enough. The true skill is being able to laugh at yourself and not take things or other people too serious. The mind of an overthinker :p

I am pretty good at straw manning. I guess I shouldn’t walk in front of my own steps, and try to communicate more simple.

Yeah, but you only learn by actually engaging in the conversation. Only I’ve noticed that I am not very tactful in how I respond. It’s better to be tactful ignorant than just blatant ignorant. Communication really is a skill. If u say something stupid while sounding stupid you will just get roasted lol.

It certainly wouldn’t hurt to actually write my own views on paper. That would make it more clear to myself, and in turn how I express it irl to others. I guess I don’t spend enough time with my own views, only in social settings when topics are brought up. Which leads to them being formulated weak and not well thought out. Funny how much time is spent on casual things but not on critical thinking…whoops

Online I find myself misunderstanding the other person way too often. Guess that’s the nature of plain text without physical cues.

IRL I might just have an unorthodox, even ignorant, way of looking at things. Which often leads me to be in the minority opposition. So yeah, wouldn’t hurt to be a better communicator lol

I feel you. Sometimes people just start to loop into the same argument. Or they are actually agreeing with me, but still have to be right in how they are formulating it.

Yeah on the internet it’s a losing game trying to convince people. I am just having this problem IRL in my friend group. Having opposing views and not being the best debater, or being able to formulate my opinions well makes me feel like I am defending myself. I am just trying to up my communications skills. Hopefully it will lead to the debates/topics being less charged.