I’m beginning to accept that I may never be in a relationship again. There are life expectations I have for myself, some admittedly selfish, but really, the idea of having to deal with another grownup who is as obstinate as I am has left me disillusioned about relationships. But I want to have kids. I want to be a father. For women, its fairy easy, go to a sperm bank, pick your choice, get the procedure done and you are on your way. What is the process for dudes? I believe its going to involve a surrogate, but where does one get a donor egg and what not? I am not looking to have a relationship with an egg donor or the surrogate, just me and the kids.

  • nicgentile@lemmy.worldOP
    22·
    3 hours ago

    Example conversation

    Me to my niece: I like the little bow on your hair.

    My niece: Thanks uncle N. I want a pink one for my birthday. Don’t forget.

    Me to my ex: I like the little bow on your hair.

    My ex: What are you trying to say? I’m a slut? Fuck you. Who do you think you are talking to?

    No, I am not kidding. She had a complicated relationship with herself, alcohol, her employer and her landlord. The previous one cheated and got pregnant, other one enabled my terrible habits and left me after I went sober and clean. I’m not expecting the exact same response but getting insulted for complimenting someone is a pain. Maybe its my choice of people, maybe its something I do or say, but I know what is working for me, hence how we got here.

    • Fizz@lemmy.nz
      81·
      2 hours ago

      Not all people are your crazy ex. The kid will say way worse than that to you they can be fucken mean when they’re pissed off at you.

      • nicgentile@lemmy.worldOP
        1·
        2 hours ago

        I get where kids come from. I’ve been raising 3 for the last couple of years. I also get where grownups come from. Its the intent. Kids say hurtful things and lash out, I’ve dealt with that. Grownups should know better than shit on a compliment, or suck someone down with their crap, or be unfaithful. Past the age of majority, yeah, you should own and carry your bag. Excuses should be out of the window. Oh, and if you read my previous post, those were 3 exes, not 1.

      • nicgentile@lemmy.worldOP
        1·
        1 hour ago

        I’m raising a 13 yr old girl, a 12 yr old boy and a 9 yr old boy. I’ve been with them on/off since all of them were in diapers, and I’ve been full contact with them going 4 years now. We are doing good.