We met on a dating app, have had two great dates so far, and I’ve been unplugging while traveling on and off. While I am really glad he is making plans for a 3rd date (I first alluded to it when I texted him after my trip), I’m totally confused and wondering if I should ask why he potentially unmatched me on the app and the mixed signals. Are there red flags? Yellow flags? Or is he just trying to play hard to get a little and it’s fair because I’ve been unplugging intentionally during my time off? For full context, please see my previous post. Any insight and advice is appreciated because I am even more flummoxed now than before. Thanks!
Reception is never a good reason to obstain from important questions to you, especially in a relationship that is very much still up in the air. This type of behavior is just going to prolong bad relationships or weaken boundaries within good relationships. Be honest and upfront, encourage them to do the same, and walk away if things are revealed you don’t like. It’s not like those things would just go away if you don’t ask.
if you’re curious about why someone did a thing, ask that person directly.
The general internet will not know any facts, and will only assume everything based on their experiences, and echo chambers they like to visit all the time…
The best advice you’ll get! Always go to the source!
At worst, he gives you a cagey answer, and then you have information about how this person handles direct questions.
At best, he gives you an understandable answer and you grow closer as a result!
Generally speaking, think about forming your statements as “When you said/did X, I felt Y”. This is sometimes called “telling your own story”. Example…
“You were being evasive!”
Vs.
“When you went off the dating app, The story I made up about it is that you were trying to avoid me”.
Even if it doesn’t work out this is always great practice for life. Best of luck!
Yeah, we’re gonna need some facts for those capitalist claims, bud.
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Walk away is my advice after I read your previous post.
Are you confused?
Or do you know exactly what to do but don’t want to admit it
Do you know if they still have the account or if they may have deleted it? Possibly they weren’t getting much out of the All… other than you, which is obvious.
I’ve used apps I didn’t like for a few weeks, and if I made a connection where we were texting off the app, I wouldn’t see a need to mention me deleting my account on the original app.
Food for thought.
Seems like the guy have moved on
I would say just ask him, but after reading all your other posts (assuming this is the same guy) id say keep looking
Just go on the date, check the vibes, and try not to be too anxious.
Its normal to be nervous when you think you might have something. But don’t let it get in the way.
