To be succinct and private… My incubator worked me for weeks to build rapport and trust with me in my younger days, to get me to tell her a something that she would ultimately, and immediately use and weaponize against me and others.
This wasnt the first time I tried to have a relationship with her, but it did finally open my eyes and become the last. In the many many decades since, I’ve not so much as acknowledge her existence when crossing paths.
That is utterly evil (ok the everyday sense). Glad you were prepped for that, but I’m very sorry that you’ve had life experiences that taught you it was necessary.
I still don’t know what Mom’s problem was with her, not that I even care. Before that point, they would each text me “You won’t believe what she said to me!”. I was stick on the middle trying to figure out what really happened, but something my mom said didn’t match with a major detail that she didn’t know about my wife’s past, so I had a feeling she was the one causing the shenanigans. That’s when I suggested the recordings.
You’re her property and another woman is encroaching on you.
That theory was definitely on my list of possibilities.
could be she saw your wife as a threat to her controlling nature, or your wife saw through her bs, and the mom is projecting. i had a former co-worker that had an extremely controlling mother, due to having trauma with thier first child(an accident) so she kept the former coworker close to her, to the point of “suffocation”.
She competed for your attention
I wouldn’t doubt it.