it sure sounds like it had a profound impact on who you are the way you engage reality/the universe.

Perhaps it did, but it was maladaptive in many ways. I’ve moved past it at this point, and it took years of struggle, therapy, several trips to the psych word, and multiple different rounds of medication. They always tried to medicalize my issue when I insisted my issue was spiritual and existential, but obviously that sounds like gibberish to doctors. And in the end it wasn’t the medication or the therapy that brought me back to reality. It was through continuing forward on my journey until I reached the point when I realized it was pointless, that this world is as real as any other, and the only one I have direct access to anyway. And then a slow climb back to consensus reality as I learned to acknowledge that the perceptions of others are valid in their own ways and that I can never fully extricate myself from society, so I shouldn’t try. So I started learning how to see the world from the inside like most people, instead of from the outside like the psychonaut I thought I was.

It had an experience I perceived as dying and I was perfectly okay with it. It was fine and felt good actually, almost disappointing upon returning.

Yeah, I can see how a K-hole would be much gentler than salvia…

I was sitting on a bed and my legs were suddenly hundreds of yards away from my body.

Yup, the dissociation/derealization on salvia can be really uncomfortable. My breakthrough doses were all on extracts, 10x and 20x. But on lighter doses I would stay in my body and the high felt very physical in a very weird sort of way. Hard to describe.

Notably one time when I went to the main ballroom of the elves who dwell there.

Man, I’ve always wanted to meet these elves. Maybe they’d be kinder than the deities in the salvia dimension. Some of the voices there are downright cruel, like it’s a sport to them to play with fools like me who believe in the reality of the physical body and world.

I never understood people who use it recreationally, way too profound.

Yeah, back when I did a bunch of psychedelics I always said it was for spiritual reasons. I thought that made it some higher or nobler purpose than just doing it for fun. But people thought that just makes me pretentious and detached from reality. I guess there’s a reason spiritual teachers tend to warn their students to keep their practice secret…

Anyway good to connect. Have a great weekend.

Same to you