Trump has suggested steam catapults every year since 2017, saying digital systems are too ‘complicated’
After nearly a decade of loudly complaining about the fact that modern US aircraft carriers use electromagnetic systems to launch fighter jets instead of steam-powered catapults, Donald Trump has directed the Pentagon to redesign a new aircraft carrier to replace the modern system with the old-fashioned catapults he prefers.
Trump signed a national security memorandum on Thursday directing the defense secretary, Pete Hegseth, and the acting navy secretary, Hung Cao, to make the change he has had his heart set on since at least 2017, when he first described his idea to Time magazine.
The memorandum gives the Pentagon leaders 60 days to come up with “a plan on the required measures to replace the Electromagnetic Aircraft Launch System and Advanced Weapons Elevators with steam and hydraulic systems for the construction of” the USS Doris Miller, a Ford-class aircraft carrier, which is already two years behind schedule.
What we’ll probably hear from him next is that he prefers steam gauges over glass cockpits and that all aircraft, civilian or military, must be retrofitted with the former. And biplanes, the Pentagon must start buying and using them. Everybody knows (except for Communists) that two wings are better than one.
There really were steam-powered aircraft, weirdly enough. Maybe trump thinks they never got a fair shake.
I think it’s more like “bring back whatever I watched on film between 1955-1990 as that’s the last time the world felt familiar”. Steam catapults from Top Gun, TriStar jet because triples are best, PanAm airlines because the stewardesses had miniskirts and cleavage. Fuck it, someone call Howard Hughes while we’re at it
It’s all fun and games until the itch.io catapults start taking over.
Maybe farmers should start watering plants with brawndo? After all, “It has electrolytes, what plants crave!”