I have not been able to find a good fit, no. Being in a rural area and being on Medicaid complicates this.
I considered online therapy, but I experience severe video/phone call anxiety. In-person therapy is fine, but the facilities around here aren’t trauma-informed/specialized in treating PTSD. They also don’t know the first thing about adult autism.
I’ve tried a couple times regardless, but I did not feel comfortable sharing any of the sensitive details to them.
I would give them a few chances, like tell them about my biological sister (18 years older than me, career criminal, took my parent’s identity more times than I can count, poisoned me with copious amounts of Benadryl over a period of time in my teens to steal from my parents, tried to suffocate me multiple times), but even sharing the smallest details did not inspire trust.
I’ve had therapists blame me or my anxiety for not being able to adapt to a hostile environment before I even was able to tell them 1% of what is actually going on. Acting as if I wasn’t being rational when I told them how many difficulties I had. Acting as if I could just ignore and get along with my sister while living with her…
Most people can’t fathom what I have been through. Since I present “normally” (i.e. mask), albeit with some level of visible anxiety, it makes it seem like things are not so bad to them.
I am seeking somebody, but I can’t afford the people who can help. Maybe one day. I have given up on getting justice and the person who raped me over and over is still free.
The cliché of “it gets better” does apply, but it takes a long ass time.
Have you had professional help?
I have not been able to find a good fit, no. Being in a rural area and being on Medicaid complicates this.
I considered online therapy, but I experience severe video/phone call anxiety. In-person therapy is fine, but the facilities around here aren’t trauma-informed/specialized in treating PTSD. They also don’t know the first thing about adult autism.
I’ve tried a couple times regardless, but I did not feel comfortable sharing any of the sensitive details to them.
I would give them a few chances, like tell them about my biological sister (18 years older than me, career criminal, took my parent’s identity more times than I can count, poisoned me with copious amounts of Benadryl over a period of time in my teens to steal from my parents, tried to suffocate me multiple times), but even sharing the smallest details did not inspire trust.
I’ve had therapists blame me or my anxiety for not being able to adapt to a hostile environment before I even was able to tell them 1% of what is actually going on. Acting as if I wasn’t being rational when I told them how many difficulties I had. Acting as if I could just ignore and get along with my sister while living with her…
Most people can’t fathom what I have been through. Since I present “normally” (i.e. mask), albeit with some level of visible anxiety, it makes it seem like things are not so bad to them.
I am seeking somebody, but I can’t afford the people who can help. Maybe one day. I have given up on getting justice and the person who raped me over and over is still free.