Like what biological function thinks it’s helpful to want to die? It’s a visceral reaction so it has to be a kind of biological intuition.
I’ve got it so bad off of something that is seemingly not worth this reaction. But I can’t shake it anyway. But if this sense is biological, then it can cascade beyond reason like an allergic reaction.
I went to a board game night with some folks who are mostly acquaintances. I show up and a group is already starting to figure out a game and it looked like the easiest group to join. This game is bad. I was chill. My teammate was chill. The people we were playing with were chill. But this game was so bad I can’t shake the fact that despite everyone having made the best of it, this was not a good social interaction. And I just feel bad. More bad than I should feel. It’s just painful.
The game was Jurassic Park Danger! And maybe I just need to tell someone. I’m not going to do anything. I don’t need a wellness check. But I can’t shake this feeling like death would be ok and maybe for the best.
What is it about bad social interactions that make us feel like death is preferable?
^ review you should leave on their website.
Anyway… suicide is almost always comorbid with feelings of social ostracism (or simply outright insanity). People don’t typically kill themselves because they are miserable - a person with two broken legs will spend days crawling across a barren landscape to find food, water, and medical attention with the hope of continuing to live. But have that person lose their 10 million dollar company after an accusation of child molestation that causes all their friends and family to shun them, and you have a different story.
I have two theories.
First, humans naturally want to help other humans in need. If you were walking through the forest looking for harvestable tubers, and you came upon a healthy adult, you might be wary and suspicious. But if they are clearly limping along on a broken foot and falling over from hunger, your fight or flight response reduces and you feel pangs of sympathy and a desire to help. Hence, when someone is socially ostricized, the thing that will gain them sympathy is acting hurt. And what better way to act hurt than to actually be hurt?
Second, humans are social animals and feel an intrinsic sense of fairness and justice in our social groups. So if a group ostricizes a memeber, self harm may be a natural way to show penance for their transgressions. A way of admitting “I know I did the wrong thing, I am so sorry that I am willing to harm myself.”
In either case, the brain develops patterns of thought leading to self harm and suicide attempts. Importantly, suicide attempts should be dramatic and obvious, but should fail. A successful suicide would be biologically disadvantageous.